Girls Night #299: How to Be Happy for Your Friends When You're Sad for Yourself
IN THIS PODCAST EPISODE YOU’LL LEARN:
Why other people's engagement announcements, promotions, and pregnancy news can feel like personal attacks (and why it's completely normal)
The "instead of" vs "before" mindset shift that changes everything about friend jealousy
Practical survival strategies for wedding jealousy when you're single, baby shower envy when trying to conceive, and promotion parties when job searching
How to feel your feelings without ruining celebrations or friendships
The bathroom break strategy that's saved countless awkward moments
Why someone else's timeline doesn't determine yours
(You can also listen right here!👇)
(Or watch the interview right here!👇)
ABOUT THIS EPISODE
Hey friend! Welcome to Girls Night — your home as you navigate your Everything Era. I'm Stephanie May Wilson, and if you've ever had to excuse yourself to cry in a bathroom at someone else's celebration, this episode is for you.
You know the feeling, right? You're genuinely happy for your friend who just got engaged, promoted, or pregnant — but there's this other part that feels like each piece of good news for someone else somehow makes your own dreams less likely to come true. If you've ever wondered how to be happy for friends when you're struggling with jealousy of friends' success, you're absolutely not alone.
Today, I'm giving you a complete survival kit for celebrating friends' success when you're still waiting for your own good news. We'll talk about navigating wedding jealousy when you're single, baby shower jealousy when you're trying to conceive, and promotion parties when you're job searching.
But first, let me tell you about the day before my husband Carl proposed to me, when one of my good friends got engaged — and I completely broke down at an Italian restaurant. Because here's what I learned that changed everything: just because someone else got something before you doesn't mean they got it instead of you. Your story is still being written, and someone else's timeline doesn't determine yours.
So grab your coffee, put in those earbuds, and let's dive in.
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Quotes mentioned:
"Just because they got something BEFORE you doesn't mean they got it INSTEAD of you."
"Her success is not your failure. Just because something wonderful is happening for someone else doesn't mean wonderful things aren't coming for you too."
"Stop measuring your Chapter 8 against someone else's Chapter 15. You're exactly where you're supposed to be."
"You can be genuinely happy for someone while also feeling sad for yourself. Both emotions are valid and can coexist."
"What if instead of seeing other people's milestones as evidence that you're behind, you saw them as evidence that good things are happening in the world?"
"Your story is still being written. The things that are meant for you will not pass you by because someone else got theirs first."
"Someone else's good news isn't taking away from your story. It's adding to the evidence that good things happen."
"The bathroom break strategy is real and necessary: Step away when you need to collect yourself. Cry if you need to. Take deep breaths. Then rejoin when you're ready."
"Your feelings are valid, but someone else's celebration isn't the right venue for processing your own disappointments."
"You'd have to be truly DECADES behind to miss being in the same season of life as your friends. A few years? In the long run, it just doesn't matter that much."
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